Getting (E)mail in the desert

I don't really care much about snail mail capabilities.  No one ever sends me mail anyway, except for my grandparents, and we'll work something out just for them.

But take away my email for a day and the pit bull will emerge.

See, I, probably more than most people, have a very close relationship with my computer.  I use it for everything:  reading the news, checking the time, converting currency, researching whatever, running stats, shopping, sending cards, keeping my diary, looking up recipes (particularly handy when your cookbooks are in the middle of the ocean), and of course, email.  I need my computer, and it needs me.

It shouldn't come as a surprise, then, that high up on the list of priorities is establishing an internet connection at our new villa (note I did not say "wreck" because, as of this past weekend, the villa is ready).

There are a few choices of ISPs in Abu Dhabi, and they all rhyme with "Etisalat."  Hurrah for state monopolies.  So off I go to dig around the Etisalat site.

Like most commercial sites, and certainly like most commercial sites in the UAE, the Etisalat webpage is about as navigable as the Bermuda Triangle (no doubt my clever master mariner friend will point out to me that the Bermuda Triangle is super-navigable, but it sounded good anyway).  So I'm going to point to a few key pages for the benefit of those who have even less patience than I.

All-in-One 3-pack:  Landline, TV, and Internet

Dhs 422 for the Gold package (download speed of 2 Mbps -- that's b for bits, not B for Bytes)

Dhs 522 for the Platinum package (download speed of 4 Mbps)

Dhs 280 for installation of either

All-in-One 2-pack:  Landline and Internet

Dhs 363 for the Gold package

Dhs 464 for the Platinum package

Dhs 180 for installation of either

Al Shamil:  Broadband Internet only

Dhs 449 (4 Mbps)

Dhs 349 (2 Mbps)

Dhs 249 (1 Mbps)

Dhs 200 for installation of any

Dhs 180 for wired modem

Holy expensive Internet, Batman!

That's USD 122.00 or GBP 74.00 per month for a lousy 4 Megabits per second connection speed.  Stateside a few years ago, we were paying about $30 a month for DSL and here in the UK we've got a brilliant international phone plan/broadband (8 Mbps, thank you very much) package for 30 quid.  I guess Etisalat is making up for the fact that all those Skype users are still getting away with making free VoIP calls to their friends and loved ones back home.

As of now, I don't know which we'll be using.  One of us hasn't watched telly since Seinfeld was still running, the other probably goes back even farther.  We've got mobile phones (I hate the things, but my husband makes me carry one around for emergencies).  So we don't really need the bundled package, but since the 2 Mbps All-in-One 3-pack costs less than the 4 Mbps Internet-only option, maybe I'll just start watching Turner Classic Movies on a regular basis.